by Jessica on April 17, 2012
Lucky for me, I managed to locate one. Ever since I was prescribed bed rest during my pregnancy with Brody, Trevor has been slowly transforming. He’s gone from hands-on dad to full-on Mr. Mom. It’s been amazing to watch, and I am so grateful for the man that he is and the dad that he’s become. Don’t get me wrong, he’s always been a fantastic dad. He has gotten in the floor with Knox to play, changed diapers, given baths, etc. Now, he’s just taken things to a whole new level. He really had to become the primary caregiver for Knox when I was on bed rest, and that was extended when Brody was born. Brody was/is not the easiest of newborns, so much of my attention had to go to him. During that time, Trevor totally took over Knox’s care. I didn’t even have to ask him to do things- he just took the initiative and knew what had to be done.
Knox stays with Trevor several days during the week, and he LOVES his time with Daddy! He has turned into the biggest Daddy’s boy ever, which is great (though it makes me kind of sad when he runs to Trevor instead of me… such is life with boys, I guess- Dad is always cooler than mom!). Trevor takes care of everything- he gets Knox up and dressed in the mornings, brushes his teeth, feeds him breakfast, puts him down for naps, and so on and so forth. We have taken on the “divide and conquer” form of parenting two boys (at least while Brody is so little and needs to nurse so often)- I take Brody and Trevor takes Knox on the days that he is off of work. We are all together, of course, hanging out, but when something has to be done, like bath time, I bathe Brody and he bathes Knox. We don’t segment off all the time or anything. When he has to be at the fire station, obviously, I do everything myself, so it’s really nice when he’s home!!
I feel blessed beyond belief to be married to a man that doesn’t shy away from parenting. I know a lot of men that wouldn’t consider diaper changing to be their “job,” but Trevor never complains about taking care of our kids. Eventually, he’ll have both of them at home with him on his days off, and he tells me he can’t wait. He’s even been talking about homeschooling them when it’s time for school… for real. I am just so impressed with him!
When we were still dating, all of the signs were there that Trevor would be a great dad. It was one of the things that drew me to him. I could never have imagined, though, the kind of father he would actually be. I could not ask for a better husband or dad to my kids. I am so thrilled for Knox and Brody to grow up with a father that will be there for them through everything, that will play with them, that will support them, that will help mold them into the men they’re to be, that will be a good Christian role model and will help them form their own relationships with God. He is so far beyond anything I could have ever hoped for them to have.
Trevor and I have gotten so much closer, with each difficulty we’ve gone through in our lives together. I am so thankful that hard things have pushed us together, rather than pulled us apart. He is truly my rock, supporting me through whatever I am going through, and he’s always there to make me laugh. I laugh all the time around him- that is not something I take for granted! He makes me happy. And it doesn’t hurt that he’s pretty easy on the eyes, too. 
I think him finding his dream job and being truly happy at work has benefited our entire family. He is personally fulfilled, and that makes him an even better husband and father.
We are so blessed to have him.
by Jessica on April 11, 2012
So last Friday night, Trevor and I had what was arguably the most-needed date night in the history of Earth. We left both boys with his parents (and plenty of breast milk for Brody!) and hit the town. I have to tell you, I was nearly giddy by the time the evening rolled around. Trevor and I haven’t been on a date in, oh… months, and we were sorely in need of some alone time. Plus, with all of the PPA issues I was having, I was really craving some quiet, adult time with my husband.
We left the house just before 6:00 and headed to Bonefish Grill for dinner. There was a short wait, so we sat at the bar and had a couple of drinks. It was so nice to go out to eat and order something really good to eat. I had Ahi Tuna, in case you’re wondering, which satisfied my sushi craving since it’s cooked very rare- delicious. I also had two more glasses of wine with dinner. Yes, I am sure you can see the writing on the wall, here. I haven’t had wine in about a year and a half, and I decide to have THREE glasses with dinner?? Genius, I tell you. Oh well, that’s a mistake that won’t be repeated!!
Anyway, after dinner, we went to see “The Hunger Games,” which was very good. I read the whole series, and you never know how a movie adaptation will stack up, but I was pleasantly surprised. I also ate an entire bag of popcorn by myself. I am sure my waistline was not appreciative of that decision.
We headed home after our movie, and true to form like a couple of old geezers, we were wiped out at 11:00. Brody ate again right when we got home, and by some miracle slept until 4:30 in the morning. It was glorious. That sounds so sad, but he is not the best sleeper at this point- I have faith that he’ll get better once we get his belly in better shape… at least I hope so!
It was seriously so nice to get to spend time alone as a couple, and we are GOING to make a date with each other monthly from here on out because 1) we need it for our sanity and 2) we need it for our relationship. When I spend time alone with Trevor, it makes me remember all of those little reasons that made me fall in love with him in the first place. You can forget about those little things when you start to see each other as only “Daddy and Mommy” and not “Husband and Wife.” I’m already looking forward to next month!
by Jessica on April 10, 2012
Well, I’m officially off of maternity leave. Sadder words have never been spoken… er, written. Thankfully, Brody is able to come to work with me like Knox was, but the sad part is that Knox is no longer coming with me. There’s no way I can handle two and still function as an employee, so he is staying home with Trevor. On days Trevor works, his dad (who is retired) will be coming over to watch Knox. I am so thankful that we are able to swing this arrangement so we don’t have to go broke putting him in daycare. He’ll still be going to preschool twice a week, so his little world won’t change all that much aside from not having his mom around during the day. I miss him already!
Before we went to work, Brody and I visited with the lactation consultant this morning. She put him on the scale first thing, and he gained another pound since last week and is at 11 pounds 11 ounces. Based on that alone, she was confident that we have an oversupply problem. Then, I fed Brody while she observed. She said she is nearly positive he does not have a milk protein allergy, rather that all of our issues are coming from this Over-active Letdown (OALD). Basically, when Brody latches on, it’s like a fire hose of milk spraying into his mouth. He gulps down tons of air since he has to drink so fast, which makes him incredibly gassy and uncomfortably full.
The LC noted several times when Brody would try to comfort nurse that my milk would let down again, making it impossible for him to satisfy his sucking urge without unintentionally overeating. He isn’t actually hungry each time he indicates he wants to nurse- he just wants to comfort nurse, but my body is not allowing it. She said she’s giving me advice that goes against what she normally tells people. She wants me to try to make him wait at least two hours between feedings and to try to use the pacifier more to help him satisfy his sucking urge. I’ve been doing two hour block feeds to try to correct the OALD, but she wants me to increase it to four hours. So, in a four hour period, all feedings will be done on the same breast. This is supposed to help regulate the supply and lessen the letdown.
Hopefully, he’ll keep improving. I have noticed a difference since I started doing block feeding, and he’s definitely more content. I can tell he’s still not where he should be, though, so I really hope this continues to help! We had a good weekend, complete with a fabulous date on Friday night, so I will tell you guys more about that later this week!
by Jessica on April 4, 2012
Things have still been less than stellar for Brody’s belly over the past few days. I could tell something else was going on with him, so I knew we’d be discussing that at his two month well check today. I went ahead and scheduled it for this week since it’s my last (boo!) week of maternity leave. I asked if we could check Brody’s stool for blood, and sure enough, there were trace amounts of it. His pediatrician suggested we go ahead and eliminate dairy from my diet again, considering we couldn’t really tell if it did any good last time when he was overeating and sending his reflux into fits.
A few of you have commented or emailed that you thought Brody may be suffering from a foremilk/hindmilk imbalance, and after researching it, I thought that may be it. I asked the doctor about it today, and he didn’t know enough about it to give me an opinion, so he called in their lactation consultant to come talk to me. She does not think it’s an imbalance, rather overactive letdown. Certainly, I can totally see this. He has all of the symptoms, coughing and choking while eating, tons of gas, mucusy poop, etc. She said it can mimic a dairy sensitivity and can even cause blood in the stool.
Brody’s pediatrician wants to go ahead and see if this is the problem, instead of cutting dairy first. So, over the next week or so I’ll work with the lactation consultant and pediatrician and will continue (I started a couple days ago after reading about the foremilk/hindmilk imbalance) block feeding, which is where you feed on only one side per feeding, then continue with that side for a couple of hours before switching. Another technique that is supposed to help is to take the baby off the breast while you’re having let down and let the excess milk spray out before putting them back on. I’ve always had crazy letdown and will leak the entire time I breastfeed- I leaked every day for 13 months with Knox, and I spray milk at the beginning of every feeding when I have letdown, so this makes perfect sense. There are also some feeding positions that are supposed to help, so we’ll try those, as well. The doctor also gave me some probiotics to give Brody every day, he thinks they’ll help with his stomach.
Please, please, please let this work!! After a couple days of block feeding, Brody had a much better day today, but I don’t know if it’s “real” or just a fluke. He smiled more at me today than he has ever done, which is awesome, so I guess we’ll see! He’s been sleeping almost the entire time we’ve been home tonight after having two shots, poor kid. Here he is from today, sucking his pacifier and totally oblivious to the fact that his chubby thighs are about to be assaulted:
Oh, and as for his stats, he is 7 weeks and 1 day old and weighs 10 pounds 12 ounces, is 22 inches long and his head is 15 inches and some change (can’t remember that part!). In a nut shell, the kid is growing like a weed, despite his tummy troubles.
by Jessica on March 30, 2012
I cannot begin to say how thankful I am for all of you. Yesterday was a rough day, and I was so hesitant to even post about the way I’ve been feeling. You made me feel so supported and loved, it was unbelievable in the best kind of way. I read every one of your kind and sincere comments, and if you emailed me, I promise that a response is coming soon- I just don’t have much time to myself at the moment! You guys helped me see that my feelings are valid and that this thing doesn’t have to define me- and it won’t!
I talked to my doctor’s office today, and I have started taking a low dose of Zoloft. I took it before trying to get pregnant for anxiety, so I know that it works well for me. The best part is that it is safe for breast feeding, so I don’t have to give that up. My OB and Brody’s pediatrician okayed it, and I’ve done research on my own, as well, and am comfortable taking it while nursing. As challenging as Brody’s eating issues have been, breast feeding is of the utmost importance to me. I know that if I quit, once I feel like myself again that would be a decision I would strongly regret. It was one of my happiest memories from Knox’s babyhood, and after 13 months of nursing with him, I definitely want Brody to have the same experience, if not for even longer.
Every child is definitely different, and bless his heart, Brody does not mean to be difficult! The poor guy has a stomachache the majority of the time, and I really feel like if we can figure out why he’s so uncomfortable all the time, he will be so much easier to deal with. I think his reflux is much better, but he is still so incredibly gassy. I am determined to get him happy, I just need to make sure I don’t lose my mind during the wait! I feel very relieved to have started on a course of action to get myself back to normal.
Thank you again, so much, for all of your support and prayers. It means the world to me, and I feel so fortunate to have such an amazing community of women to share my feelings with. Sometimes blogging is about venting, but I swear, it’s really nice to be able to vent AND get a ton of advice on top of that emotional release. It’s truly an amazing thing, and I appreciate each and every one of you! Thanks for being there.
