I’m having “one of those days” almost every day. I swear, I am so burnt out, I just don’t have the energy for anything. I am so sick of the constant job hunt, and I find myself thinking about it way too much. Parenting is wearing me out, too, namely because I don’t sleep any more. Weaning Brody is not going well because the kid does not want to wean. I know in my head that if I wean him, it will be a few craptastic days, then it will get better. However, I am just so darn exhausted that I cannot bring myself to willingly lose sleep for a few days, no matter how sweet the end result may be.
Knox is always on my mind, too, he’s doing well at his new preschool and with therapy, I just can’t “relax” when it comes to him and am always worrying about something. Comes with the territory, I guess.
I did find out that my current job is no longer in imminent danger of ending. I think my boss freaked out when he realized I would actually be gone and he’d be on his own, so he said “we can work something out.” While that is a huge relief, it still doesn’t change the fact that I need to find something that gives me the chance to grow and do what I really love, which is marketing. I was able to add residential into my real estate job here, which is great, so now I can do it on the side without the exorbitant fees involved with doing it for another company. I have one client right now, and hopefully I’ll sell our house in March when we put it back on the market. Maybe that will help ease the stress on our finances since I know we’ll be taking a loss on our house if and when it sells.
Right now, I feel like I am treading water and going absolutely nowhere. Do you ever feel that way? I feel like I’m waiting for something but have no idea what that something may be. I just keep praying that things will work out and that God will give me strength to power through the way I feel right now. I’m so thankful for my church family right now because those ladies keep my head above water when I start to feel like I’m sinking. I find myself waiting for Sunday each week so that I can go to church and get filled spiritually because it really does help me to make it through the stresses of life.
This has been such a rambling disaster of a post, but that’s just what I feel like right now. I think I may really need a vacation!! I find myself thinking about running away to Disney World when I feel like this… is that super weird? That’s where we went on our honeymoon, and I swear, it really is the happiest place on Earth! Maybe all of my boys and I will move to Disney World and forget about things like jobs, Autism, weaning, teething and houses to sell! Oh Mickey Mouse, you’ve got the right idea!
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