I had my IUD placed yesterday. Well. That was a very memorable experience. I guess my first mistake was looking at the approximately 800 surgical tools on the counter. After some chit-chat between the OB and I, she got down to business. It was not excruciating by any means, but I felt a good four big ole’ pinches in the hoo ha region. Enough to make me squint my eyes and tense up and want it to be over… right then. They use some torture device to pry open your cervix, which you feel, then you feel the Mirena go in, as well. After all was said and done, maybe two minutes total, I felt fine.
Until I didn’t.
I could feel myself start to get hot and immediately asked for a magazine to fan myself off with. Knowing exactly what that means, they also got me a few cool towels for my forehead and neck. The nurse returned with a glass of water while I fanned myself like a crazy person. I started to calm down a little, so they left me to recuperate with the door cracked (in case I needed help) and told me to take my time. Never a dull moment with me, in case you didn’t notice.
I started to feel a little better, so I slowly sat up. Bad plan, kids. Very bad plan. I recognized immediately that I had made a fatal error and dropped back to a horizontal position, but it was too late. My OB chose to walk back in right then and could tell I was about to go. She checked my pulse (which was insanely low) and pronounced that I needed caffeine and sugar immediately. She laid me back further and brought me back a Coke. Another nurse came in with smelling salts, and she is actually a friend from Sunday school! So, after Dr. L was sure I was not going to keel over, she left me with my friend, who fanned me and brought me more Coke and a cupcake until my color returned to human levels. Apparently I was as white as the paper on the table when she came in. So, I probably had to lay there for an hour after the Mirena until I was sure I could get up again. I just LOVE having vaso vagal reactions to everything like that. <-- Sarcasm. I'm the same with blood draws and always have to elevate my feet and drink something sugary during the process so I don't faint... because I will, otherwise. In a heartbeat.
By the time I was able to leave, Trevor, who was watching both boys, had already sent me several "COME HOME IMMEDIATELY OR THE WORLD WILL END!!!" text messages, so he was quite thrilled when I got home!!
Near-fainting episode aside, I was super crampy and uncomfortable for a few hours after the insertion. Immediately after the cramps were pretty painful, like the worst period cramps you've ever had, but that only lasted about half an hour. Also, it seriously felt like something was shoved up there all evening long, but the nurses and doctor assured me that was just my irritated cervix and not the Mirena that I was feeling. They were obviously right, considering today, I feel totally fine. Very light cramps and super minimal spotting, but that's it! They told me I can have light spotting for up to four months (at most) and light cramps for about a week, but hopefully all will go well other than that. It's definitely a relief to have that over and done with and know that we won't be getting any surprises any time soon! I love my boys, but I do believe that two is plenty for our family!!
Any of you guys totally loving (or hating) your Mirena? Thinking of getting one? So far, so good, here, now that I'm totally conscious!!
P.S. Boudreaux's Butt Paste is giving one of my blog readers a $100 Visa gift card, so make sure to leave a quick comment HERE to enter!!
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